“The pleasure’s all mine, indeed.” He licked his lips and asked, “Are you one of the, uh, one of the new secretaries?”
“I’m the new administrative intern,” I smirked. “Well, I’ve been here for a couple weeks now.”
“You come down from State?”
I bashfully shook my head. “No sir. I graduated two years ago from the University of Michigan. Guess I’m still trying to figure out what I’m doing with my life.”
“Wait a minute – do my ears deceive me?” he waddled over to the door and shouted, “There’s another wolverine around here? And here I was thinking I was the only U of M graduate in the whole goddamn state!” The door slammed shut and he pointed to his grin. “Do you see this smile, right now? This is pure happiness. Why the hell are you interning if you’ve got a degree from such a great school?” he said in a lightened mood.
If he were as smart as he thought, he would know there were no such thing as coincidences.
“You could say I’m trying to get my foot in the door, sir,” I said humbly.
“Is this a paid position?”
That fat pig knew there was no such thing as a paid internship. “Unfortunately it’s not,” I pouted my lip. “Though I’m hoping my talent’s recognized and I have an opportunity to get hired on.” My eyelids fluttered in a way that made the pig question whether I winked at him.
The fool smiled so widely I saw his wisdom teeth. “We’ll see what we can do for you,” he said and waddled away, whistling.
I had that effect on men. I suppose any half-decent looking woman who batted an eye did, really. Blush or act the curious virgin and men start thinking with their other head. They cease to use basic sense and sometimes stop using logic altogether.
Later that afternoon I was eating lunch in the lobby downstairs when security escorted out a teary, puffy eyed woman carrying a box. The moment I got back inside, the secretaries already were gossiping behind closed doors.
“What’d they fire Linda for?” whispered Amy.
Sue scoffed and slurped her coffee. “Do you really need to ask? Isn’t it clear the poor woman was too old and not pretty enough? That little bitch prancing around the office is making us all look bad.”
“Sue,” hissed Melanie. “Janelle’s a nice girl.”
“Oh, she is?” asked Sue. “You didn’t notice the governor swooning over her in the break room this afternoon? The slut told him she’s overqualified and was bragging about her degree. Pretty much saying she was better than the rest of us. Fucker played right into it, too. You know how into his alumni he is. The bastard made a few calls and the next thing you know, Linda’s on her way out. This is why we need to unionize.”
“How would you even know about this?” Amy asked skeptically.
“I was on the other side of the wall listening to the whole thing. You know McKinstry thinks with that worm between his legs. I knew he was up to something.”
Amy, still doubtful, said, “I don’t think that’s the case. The governor’s a good man.”
“Don’t be so naïve. He’s a man, Amy. That’s all I have to say about that. Mark my words – she’ll be in Linda’s old desk by the end of the week.”
It wasn’t ten minutes before the pig strolled up proving Sue right. “Good afternoon, governor,” I said, business as usual, playing coy as I dared.
“Good afternoon, Janelle.” He had both hands in his pockets as he teetered back and forth between his toes and his heels. “Can you guess who I was on the phone with earlier today?”
I played stupid and thought for a moment, despite hearing the swine in his office stuffing his face and blabbering about my ‘assets’ on the phone. I had the seat furthest from his office, though I heard him as if he were next to me. “I don’t have the slightest clue, sir.”
“Your former dean.”
“Dean Wilkinson?”
“Jerry and I go way back,” he said.
“You’re kidding me!” I said with as much enthusiasm as I could muster. “I haven’t seen Dean Wilkinson in like, three years. I babysat his granddaughter Autumn.” I put my hand to my heart. “She was such a sweet girl.” In truth, the child was an entitled harlot. Before meeting her, I’d never been called a slut to my face. I did not expect to hear it from a six-year-old.
“He told me you’d made the Dean’s List all four years. That’s impressive for an administrative intern.”
“I’ve always wanted to help people,” I insisted. “Important people, small people. It doesn’t matter. As long as I can help make some kind of difference.”
“Well as it happens, my former executive assistant put in her resignation this afternoon.”
“You’re kidding,” I said and surely he recognized the disbelief written all over my face.
He grinned and sipped his coffee, slurping it as if he were drinking from a public fountain. “Not in the least. It’s a loss, of course, but I would never stop someone from pursuing other opportunities.”
Is that what they call it now? “I’m sorry to hear that.” I bit my lip. “I hope you’re able to find a suitable replacement. It’s never good when someone you depend on just… leaves out of the blue.”
“It’s funny that you mention replacements,” he said and his chins jiggled as he leaned forward onto my desk. “I know of a certain intern who’s in need of a paying, ah, position.”
“You can’t be talking about me,” I said, sounding as shocked as he hoped. He grinned so hard I heard his teeth grinding.
He nodded his head and I was certain I heard his chins clap. “I imagine you can start tomorrow,” he said. “I’ll have Amy process all the necessary paperwork and we’ll get you moved into that office next to mine. I suppose we’ll have to get you some things for your new position.” He glanced at my naked desk. “A phone for damn sure.” He extended that fat, clammy hand of his and I stood to shake it with both of mine.
“You won’t regret this, governor,” I assured him, grinning from ear to ear.
He bit his bottom lip so hard it blanched white. “I don’t expect I will.”